Oh, Canada

I’m not a dog owner but I’m really just as shocked as you are…


You might think this is a weird time for me to be coming at you, given the dumpster fire that is Congress right now. I know, Paul Ryan would rather watch a 76-year-old civil rights leader sit on the floor for hours than pull his head out of his own ass, and I’m going to harp on you about this? Well, yeah, I am. Because I’ve come to expect better from you, Canada.

You gave us Ryan Reynolds, who, besides being an absolute stud and awesome person, gave us Deadpool. Your dreamboat of a prime minister is unapologetically, fantastically progressive, whether it’s been about equal pay or refugees or native land rights. You have that whole healthcare thing just about sorted. You’ve got some lovely places, even if you weren’t always my first thought when it came to vacation. You made those funny ads about Americans being welcome if Trump…

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